Star in Your Own Life

I got my name in lights with notcelebrity.co.uk

By Seleus Blelis

You're the star of your own life. The leading man or woman. You choose not to play the wise-cracking best friend or funny sidekick. Maybe you've play that role long enough. But now is the time to shine and show the world what you're made of. We all have that chance to change even the littlest things, into something beautiful and lasting.  This comes from a pure place because you want to evolve and understand past actions that have caused you such unhappiness. But that cannot happen if you are blinded by ignorance and arrogance. 

Once you begin to question the same patterns that keep repeating themselves in your life, then you can begin to replace them with a whole new set of tools. My tools are Faith, Practice and Study. Always remember the one thing that is constant in your environment- YOU. And if YOU put the blame on others for your own misery, you will never see a change. 

Even if you don't believe in this practice. The same rules apply. It all starts with you. The beauty of this practice, is that you can be the star of your own life and be freed from delusion.  You can see clearly why and how you are suffering. What lead to it? And then, what you can do about it. You can win by having a indestructible spirit. By knowing that you at least tried and fought. 

When you clearly envision a victorious outcome, engrave it in your heart and are firmly convinced that you will attain it, your brain makes every effort to realize the mental image you have created. Then, through unceasing efforts, that victory is finally made reality. You are the playwright of your own victory. 

 (3/9/93 Faith In Action)

Surviving Lotus Flowers

By Seleus Blelis aka Loflo


There are no coincidences in our practice. Everything is connected, happens for a reason and leads to places that you've never been before or right back to where you were meant to be. For a few years now, I was given the nickname Loflo (short for Lotus Flower). It is funny and sweet to be called that but I was never really comfortable with it. I am only one flower in a vast pond of possibilities. Everyone is a Lotus Flower. When it came to naming this blog, Lotus Flower was of course the obviously choice because if its significance in our practice. 

While searching for Lotus images for this blog, I stumbled across a site called After Silence- an organization, whose mission is to support, empower, validate, and educate survivors of rape, sexual abuse and all types of sexual violence by providing a safe, extensive, reliable and easy-to-read website where victims can find the answers and support they need to heal and reclaim their lives. 

Now why did this site turn up in my search you may ask? Well, their site's banners, logos, and symbol is of a Lotus Flower. And it also turned up because I am also a survivor of abuse.

From their website:  Why the Lotus Flower?

"Lotus flowers have strong symbolic ties to survivors.  The lotus flower grows out of mud. Yet, it rises above the surface clean, blooms with remarkable beauty, and its beauty remains untouched by the mud. The flower closes and sinks underwater at night, but it rises and opens again at dawn. Lotus flowers have strong symbolic ties to survivors. They start as small flowers down at the very bottom of a pond and then slowly grow and rise towards the surface, continually moving towards the light. Once the lotus flower has reached the surface of the water, it begins to blossom and turns into a magnificent flower.
 
The lotus flower is a symbol for courage, purity, and awakening, and it mirrors survivors' journey toward healing and recovery. Like the lotus flower, survivors have been at the bottom of the pond but can rise above it to show their worth, courage, and untouched beauty."
 
I can't think of a better symbol to use but The Lotus Flower to convey what surviving is all about. I always knew what the Lotus Flower meant but it was only until a couple of months ago when I started on my journey toward healing and recovery, that I fully understood my connection to it. And why I'm called Loflo for a reason. But there are millions of Loflos out there, men and women who are currently suffering from whatever it is- abuse, job and/or relationship loss, low-self-esteem, depression, sickness, etc.
 
For me it is comforting to know that we all can rise above the water despite the obstacles. Its important to remember that while we are under that muddy water, we are all still beautiful. We can achieve and bring forth our Buddha nature even when the waters seems dark. We can achieve this by chanting sincere Daimoku, having faith and making the right causes, through our thoughts words and actions. So when the time is right, a beautiful flower springs up and shines. Because no matter how hard things are, we Loflos can always bloom. As for me, its lead me to create this site for everyone but also having the courage to heal.

"A lotus is a flower that blooms in the mud, the deeper the mud the more beautiful the lotus blooms."

Please visit their site. Its very important to reach survivors and promote awareness on rape, sexual abuse, and sexual assault. Thank you

     

Freckles

Freckles

by Natasha Bedingfield

I used to care so much about what others think about
Almost didn’t have a thought of my own
The slightest remark would make me embark
On the journey of self doubt
But that was a while ago
This girl has got stronger
If I knew then what I know now
I would have told myself don’t worry any longer it's OK

'cause a face without freckles is like a sky without stars
Why waste a second not loving who you are
Those little imperfections make you beautiful, lovable, valuable,
They show your personality inside your heart
Reflecting who you are

Who you are
Who you are
Who you are

I wondered if I could trade my body with somebody else in magazines
With the whole world full at my feet
I phantom worthy and would blame my failures on the ugliness I could see
When the mirror looked at me
Sometimes I feel like the little girl who doesn’t belong in her own world
But I'm getting better
And I'm reminding myself

[Chorus]

Reflecting who you are
Reflecting who you are

Source: Photos by me, deviantart)

My 3rd Year

Today, I celebrate my Gohonzon Birthday. Its been 3 years now since I became a Nichiren Buddhist and oh what a wonderful ride its been so far. It is true when they say that it is easy to begin but harder to continue. My Gohonzon was presented to me by the wonderful late Tim Dennis at the White Plains cultural center. I remember that day like it was yesterday. I was so ready. I felt it in my bones. I felt like I was shot into the sun. I was beaming. I anxiously awaited the for the day to enshrine my Gohonzon. I was excited and went out and bought everything for my Butsudan. I could feel myself glowing. A new beginning, life, way, tools, friends, family, understanding and awareness. 

Thank you- Seleus Blelis

Birds flying high
You know how I feel
Sun in the sky
You know how I feel
Reeds driftin' on by
You know how I feel
It's a new dawn
It's a new day
It's a new life
For me
And I'm feeling good

Groundhog Day

"When Chekhov saw the long winter, he saw a winter bleak and dark and bereft of hope. Yet we know that winter is just another step in the cycle of life. But standing here among the people of Punxsutawney and basking in the warmth of their hearths and hearts, I couldn't imagine a better fate than a long and lustrous winter."- Phil Connors

That is a line from the funny 1993 Harold Ramis film "Groundhog Day. It stars Bill Murray as a egotistical and cynical weatherman Phil Connor who is sent to Punxatawney, Penn., to cover Groundhog Day. He rather be anywhere than near that darn groundhog. He's accompanied on this trip by Rita (Andie McDowell), the segment producer. Because of a snowstorm, they are forced to stay another day. When he wakes up the next morning at 6am (with Sonny and Cher singing "I Got You Babe" on the clock radio), he discovers that it's Groundhog Day all over again. Everyone and everything is the same except for him. And it keeps happening over and over, day after day after day.

Just like my review of the film "Harold & Maude", this film also has a Buddhist theme. According to Buddhist critic Tom Armstrong, its "the greatest Buddhist movie ever made". 

I really enjoy this film and upon re-watching this past weekend, you yourself will feel like your stuck in a time loop and want to catch the next greyhound bus out of town for good. But more importantly, you can see that change is possible. The kind of change that affects you, your environment and your karma. 

You leave the film thinking, man Phil is one enlightened guy! Phil is not a god. He never says he is but believes he's like a god. But he's an ordinary person like all of us. We may see what he was able to accomplished as extraordinary (like having super powers or something, which I will address in a upcoming post), but its fact is not. Phil perfectly depicts what a Bodhisattva is. 

So we know that Phil relives the same day over and over again. The same events happen, day in and day out. But how is he like a Bodhisattva? As witness his journey into the Ten Worlds (some say his character is in a time loop for about 8.5 years or more) ,he begins to realize that in order to break this cycle he needs to change himself. Here is what we know about Phil and a general sequence of events that happen to him:

• He's not a nice guy, arrogant, insincere, egocentric.
• He cannot believe the day is repeating itself, aggravated.
• He tests how far he can go without ever paying for any consequences for his actions (punching out a man, overeating, robbing money),  "I don't worry about anything anymore".
• He has fun getting information to use the following day to take advantage of people, testing his memory of events.
• He uses the same tactics on the segment producer Rita so he can woo her. 
• She repeatedly slaps and rebuffs his advances.
• He looks terrible, tired and defeated, and figures he has to stop the groundhog so Winter could end 

PHIL (sarcastic, to camera) Well, that's it.  Sorry you couldn't be here in person to share the electric moment.  This is one event where television really fails to capture the excitement of thousands of people gathered to watch a large squirrel predict the weather, and I for one am deeply grateful to have been a part of it. Reporting for Channel 9, this is Phil Connors. 
RITA You want to try one that's a little sweeter? 
PHIL That's as sweet as I get.  I'm outa here.

• He drives off a cliff (with the groundhog in tow) to his suppose death
• He survives that so begins his quest find other ways to off himself (stabbed, poisoned, hanged, frozen, jumps off a building, burned, electrocuted.
• He thinks he's a god because he survived all of those attempts and tries to convince Rita by telling her all the things he knows about her, Punxatawney and its people.

After spending the day with Rita, she realizes this is not the same jerk she once knew. He is being honest, opened, and there is this kind of realization that sets in for him. But not the realization you think. He's close to it though. He thought he had the power to control everyone and everything. He wasted his days for selfish reasons, but once that idea got tired. He tried to kill himself to escape his suffering, but that didn't work- he thought okay now what? I thought that even though he was experiencing the same day over and over again, he was creating new experiences. The more you learn about what works and what doesn't work, you begin to expand and grow as a person. He was discovering parts of himself that maybe he never knew existed or was possible.


RITA I'm just amazed. And I'm not easily amazed.
PHIL About what?? 
RITA How you can start a day with one kind of expectation and end up so completely different.

In other words, change you, change your environment. 

To me the turning points happens when he's with Rita flipping cards in a hat and he says that its always the same day, February 2nd and there is nothing I can do about it. Rita tells him:

"I don't know, Phil. Maybe it's not a curse. It just depends on how you look at it."

Later when she falls asleep, he speaks from his heart to Rita and says:  "It doesn't matter what happens tomorrow or for the rest of my life. I'm happy now."

• Now he wakes up with a different more positive attitude.
• Learns how to play the piano, ice sculpt, speak french, attempts to save man' life who once before he completely ignored.
• Saves a kid falling out of a tree, fixes a flat tire for a bunch of elderly women, helps a choking man, shows his piano playing abilities at the groundhog banquet..slowly but surely impressing Rita.
• He unveils his ice sculpture of Rita and says "I'm happy now because I love you no matter what happens. 
• He wakes up again, next to Rita...its a brand new day, February 3rd

"Groundhog Day" really illustrates the Buddhist concept of samsara, the continuing cycle of birth and death that ordinary people undergo in the the world of illusion and suffering. Buddhists regard this suffering one must escape. This rebirth is referred to as "transmigration in the six paths." The six paths are the realms of hell, hungry spirits, animals, asuras, human beings, and heavenly beings. Unenlightened beings are born into one of the six paths in accordance with their actions in their previous existence; when the present life is over,they are reborn in the same or another of the six paths, REPEATING this process so long as they fail to free themselves from it. Sound familiar? Freeing oneself from transmigration is our goal. The causes for such transmigration are regarded as ignorance of the true nature of life and selfish craving. In order to free yourself from this, you must awaken to the truth of your life and eliminate selfish craving, which leads to attaining nirvana.

The film also illustrates the Buddhist concept of attachment. Because of our attachment to ignorance, hatred, greed or things outside ourselves, we are never satisfied. And the more attach we become, the more we experience misery, complaints and doubt.

Phil awakened to the truth which is why he would be considered a Bodhisattva. A Bodhisattva is one who aspires to attain enlightenment or Buddhahood and carries altruistic practice. Phil displays this in many forms when he begins to give back, save lives and more importantly shows compassion for the citizens of Punxsutawney. In Nichiren Buddhism, one can attain Buddhahood in your present form and completed in a single lifetime. Phil goes through the lower ten worlds over and over and in the end, finds happiness and satisfaction in devoting himself to relieving the suffering of others. His early selfish actions (bad causes), did not yield good results (effects) for him either. When he began to embrace his life, his existence- he changed the people around him. They were magnetized to him or as we say attracted to his high life condition. And as a result, finds a genuine love relationship with Rita.

Many may wonder how he gets there. One could say because he really heard what Rita said and changed his perceptions when he stopped trying and began to care or when he stopped making bad causes and surrendered to the truth of his heart. I like to think its because he had a omamori with him (traveling case that holds your Gohonzon) in his room or somewhere, he was shakabukued. And after every failed day, he chanted to find clarity and wisdom. It was trial and error each time but he finally found the key to unlock his suffering. Here the eightfold path is evident. He had the self-awareness, optimism and courage to change his life. We all do. Its about acknowledging that the mistakes we make, can be improved upon and by making one small or big change, you can significantly achieve whatever it is you want. In other words, you are ultimately responsible for your own happiness.

According to Dean Sluyter, the author of Cinema Nirvana: Enlightenment Lessons from the Movies, the film repeat parts of the same day forty-two times, or six weeks, exactly the time we will wait for winter to end if the groundhog sees his shadow. “In other words,” he said, “we are the groundhog and we are afraid of our own shadow, a shadow created by light. That light is truth, reality. Ultimate truth, then, is not a bummer. It’s nothing.”

But that can't be done if you stay in your groundhog shadow because you will never see the Spring. He saw Winter has an opportunity, a challenge to change himself and his environment. And as we learned from our Buddhist practice Winter never fails to turn into Spring.

By Seleus Blelis
 

Smile

Seleus

Photo by Me

The nobility
of a smile
exuding invincible resolve
is the hallmark of
a brilliant victor

(SGI President Daisaku Ikeda March 2009 Editorial)

A beautiful song, composed by Charlie Chaplin featured in the 1936 film "Modern Times" 

 

Smile Scene 

 

We're All Lotus Flowers!

In Buddhism, the term Renge, literally means "Lotus Flower, " hence the title Lotus Sutra. The lotus is deeply significant in the traditions of Buddhism. In nature, the lotus plant flowers and fruits at the same time, thus symbolizing the simultaneity of cause and effect. We know from the study of the scientific method that cause and effect underlie all phenomena. Everything has its causes and its effects. In Buddhism, this cause and effect has a deeper resonance as applied to human life. We create causes through thoughts, words and actions. With each cause made, an effect is registered simultaneously in the depths of life and those effects manifested when we meet the right environmental circumstances. The Lotus flower is also symbolically prized in Buddhism because it blooms in a muddy swamp, thereby signifying the emergence of our Buddha nature from the "swamp" of everyday desires and problems. In a similar vein, society is also likened to a muddy swamp in which Buddhas appear. This, no matter how difficult our lives, how trying our circumstances, the flower of Buddhahood can always bloom.

(The Buddha in your Mirror, sgi-uk.org ) 

Seleus

A good and talented friend of mines Artman2112- used my likeness as a illustration of this. He said he got the idea from a photo of mines. He said "it looked like my face was emerging from darkness - the swirling purple stuff (my fave color!) is sort of "life's confusion" and the lotus' and you are emerging from it together. I thought about the lotus flower, the practice and how the lotus symbolizes that same thing, rebirth, reawakening, etc. It seemed more and more fitting to me as I learned more about you, your struggles/triumphs last year and from the past. And the picture came to represent "you" more as time went on."

I really appreciate his wonderful talent and the time he took to create this. I wanted to share this illustration with you all and more importantly add that we are ALL BEAUTIFUL LOTUS FLOWERS. Its beauty is nourished through its roots in the mud. This is a metaphor for our lives. Chanting Nam-myoho-renge-kyo uses the `mud` in our lives to enable us to reveal our highest life state.  :D

Try and Get Me!

By Seleus Blelis 2007

I visualize my devilish functions as gangsters in a 40's style film-noir. They linger in the shadows, in dark corners, up on rooftops, sitting in cars- awaiting for the very moment to make their move on you. So when you experience just a bit or slither of happiness- you can bet - they will appear, right on schedule, on time..ringing your doorbell, jumping out from those shadows, flying down from those rooftops, jumping you and wrestling you to the ground. Not a word is spoken because you know what they want. They're holding a gun to your head or any weapon of their choice- because you got them ANGRY.

Who are you to be happy? You have pissed them off. And because they know you so well, they say to themselves 'hmm let's see, how can we mess you up, hit you where you live, destroy your life condition?'

They hit you in places they know is going to get you down, stop you from your mission, stand in the way of your human revolution- (i.e. unresolved anger, resentment, relationship, financial, personal problems).

 "In Buddhism, demons represent functions of human nature and the environment that bring misery and suffering.  These demons and devils- the robbers of life and benefit-are actually the negativity inherent in our lives.  They can appear as negative internal feelings and as external influences that try to obstruct our Buddhist practice."- sgi.org

In the beginning of my practice. I knew the one area I had to address right away. It wasn't the thing that brought me to the practice (or so I thought- but that's another discussion..lol)

I was abused when I was child and when I began my practice- the first thing I did was forgive that person and chanted for their happiness. You see for me..as long as you hold on to whoever it was that wronged you- you will never be free. Its not about vengeance or the fact that you think by letting this go the person will think its OK what they did to you. Its how this is affecting you, not them. Whoever hurts you- because they made a bad cause, will eventually suffer a bad effect.

Knowing this, you slowly learn to let this go. Have faith in the practice, that things of this nature take care of themselves on their own in due time. Its not your responsibility. Your only responsibility is to be happy and for you to create it. Don't you owe yourself that much?

In other words, its like you've been taking poison all along hoping they get sick. They wont, your just wasting valuable time. Because all this time, you've been the one whose slowly been poisoning yourself.
The number one thing I chant for the most is to be a woman of unlimited self-esteem. I believe it all starts there, for all of us.

When we take back our power- those gangsters (the robbers of your life) will get the picture. You turn the gun back on them, shoot them all down one by one. And I think that's what this practice means to me. Its not easy, it takes time..but we learn and grow from it. Blossoming, emerging from the muddy waters as a survivor.

And when we find ourselves outnumbered- call a member..they certainly have enough ammunition to give you. :D

Artwork by www.impawards.com

Harold & Maude...& Buddhism

by Seleus Blelis

There are a slew of films with Buddhist themes from The Wizard of Oz, Singin' in the Rain, The Matrix and Groundhog Day. But a couple of years ago before I received my Gohonzon, I saw a little film called Harold & Maude (1971).  Let's just say the rest is history. The film took on a significance with me that can only be summed up in two words- Be Happy.

 
I was studying and asking questions about Nichiren Buddhism at the time and I couldn't get over how Buddhist Maude was. She came into this young man's life for a specific reason, it was no coincidence. Speaking for myself, you see and/or taught that happiness is temporary, fleeting, take it while you can. Suffering is a part of life and happiness is not possible.  Harold's problem and for the majority of people is that we are fundamentally unhappy. As the film unfolds, I couldn't get over how happy Maude was. She displayed an array of human emotions from sadness to joy, but maintained an indestructible spirit. The lessons of life she was teaching wasn't only for Harold but for the audience.

In essence, she was shakabuking us and I recognized this right away. How do you become happy? "Appreciate your life. You are a Buddha. You are the best thing that ever appeared on this whole planet. You are the greatest thing in the whole universe. If you believe that there is nothing you cannot do with your life, then there is nothing you cannot do. To believe that you can do anything is to bring your life into harmony".- (Mr. Sonoda: 2000).

Here are a few examples of Maude's wisdom:

                                                          Source

Free yourself from attachments that cause suffering-   

 "Well, if some people are upset because they feel they have a hold on some things, then I'm merely acting as a gentle reminder - I'm sort of breaking it easy. Here today, gone tomorrow, so don't get attached to things."  

Have a positive attitude-  "Greet the dawn with the Breath of Fire!"

Relish every moment of your life-

"Don't play anything! Dear me. Everyone should be able to make some music. Why, it's life! - Rhythm and harmony - That's the cosmic dance. Come with me."

Experience your life-

 "I like to keep a variety. I'm always looking for the new experience, like this one.

something new each day to find it out. After all, we're given life."

Never give up-

"Reach out! Take a chance! Get hurt maybe. But play as well as you can. (she leads a cheer before the stands) Go team, go! Give me an "L." Give me an "I." Give me a "V." Give me an "E.

LIVE!!!!!"

Embrace your Humanity- 

"I cry at beauty - a first snow, a rose, a sunset. I cry when a man tortures his brother... when he repents and forgiveness is refused... and when it is granted.  begs forgiveness... when

To cry is to laugh. To laugh is to cry... a uniquely human trait. 

And the main thing in life, my dear Harold, is not to be afraid to be human."

 

Source 

In the Gosho, “Winter Always Turns to Spring”-

"Well, not dying, actually. I'm changing. You know, like from winter to spring.

Of course, it is a big step to take"

(Winter Always Turns into Spring- Nichiren Daishonin wrote the following:

 

Those who believe in the Lotus Sutra are as if in winter, which never fails to turn into spring. Never have I seen or heard of winter turning into autumn. Nor have I ever heard of any believer in the Lotus Sutra who remained a common mortal. A passage from the sutra reads, “Among those who hear of this Law, there is not one who shall not attain Buddhahood.”    (Gosho, p. 832; MW-1, p. 150)
In his explanation, the Daishonin compared the definitive principles of faith with the certainty of the changing of the seasons. Thus, just as winter turns to spring without fail, those who uphold faith in the Lotus Sutra will attain enlightenment without fail, even though they will definitely encounter obstacles.

I will end this post with my favorite scene that sums it all up  

 

Be Steps Ahead of your Devilish Functions

by Seleus Blelis

Today I had many thoughts and questions about devilish functions. Everyone knows what they look like or do they? They can be so transparent to some people. So obvious. Ever wonder why they keep disturbing us right where we live (our financial pockets, relationships, etc).

For example, say your having money problems. Finding work. You book a show, a gig, a project, etc. You’re constantly finding ways to survive. So one day, you get a call for a show...great right? You’ve been chanting like wildfire to get it. Then a half an hour after that, you get a call that says the show you’re were banking on to pay your bills, just got cancelled. Then you chant again. Now the show or job that you did book requires you to be there on time. So you get into your car and hit every frigging light. You’re running late. etc etc...lol there’s a obvious pattern here.

Your DF (devilish functions), are trying to thwart your every move. After a while, they become so obvious to you. They know where to strike you and like I’ve said before, they get angry when you succeed. They’re rejoicing! Say now, you’ve conquer a challenge. You didn’t resort back to your old tendencies or way of doing things/reacting etc. Now your DFs, are having a meeting. A meeting to discuss how and where they’re going to get you next.

Our practice helps us to be steps ahead of them, to keep moving. We have to anticipate their next moves. Sure you chanted, but did you chant with faith? There lies the difference. Your DFs will always be there if don’t have faith in yourself and in this practice. You have to no matter what be steps ahead of them.

An Introduction