A Rosie Outlook

By Sally Marks

Thanks for contributing this story Sally!

                                  by grafitomane

I was crabby yesterday.  Basically I’m an optimistic person, but yesterday I was a grouch.  I had a slight setback regarding our upcoming book, and I was annoyed.  I probably should have taken a walk, but I didn’t.  I ate a donut instead.  

I didn’t specifically go out in search of a donut.  A client asked me to meet him at the Dunkin Donuts shop near my office and I complied.  Normally I wouldn’t have opted for the sugary pastry, but I was in a bad mood and I went against my better instincts.  

Fortunately for me the donut and hot chocolate were very unsatisfying.  Indulgent pleasures generally are.  I get that little sugar high and then a big let down, both physically and emotionally.  After all, it’s January and losing weight and exercising are always top contenders of my New Year’s resolutions.  Donut eating is not on the list. 

However, I did take some positive actions.  I mailed a proposal, stopped at the library and checked out an inspirational book, self help book, and wrote several query letters to literary agents.  I make it a point that when I suffer a setback I take immediate steps to counteract it.  Unfortunately, I ate the donut before I took my positive actions. 

That evening I went to a Buddhist meeting.  I saw an unfamiliar face and introduced myself.  Once we started talking I realized I had met her before, but since she had not been to meetings in a while I didn’t recognize her.  She told everyone she had become busy at work and her once-strong efforts to strive for personal growth and work for world peace (basic Buddhist tenets) had fallen by the wayside.  Unfortunately, her dedicated efforts at work (60-hour work weeks and plenty of stress) took a toll on her health.  She became sick and subsequently lost her job due to her illness. 

However, rather than fall into a funk over her job loss and declining health, she saw the events as an opportunity to revive her Buddhist practice.  It was inspiring to listen to her as she made a determination to start anew. She spoke eloquently and her eyes shone with conviction.   

My mood was instantly lifted.  She voiced what a lot of folks face in their life – going through the motions of living and not really engaging one’s heart. I thought about the difference of merely writing my goals and making a real determination to create a significant change in my life.  I realized that simply writing goals was an intellectual exercise at best and a mere habit at worst.   

Don’t get me wrong, I’m not advocating a brain bypass.  But knowledge by itself is not the answer.  Heart-felt conviction is crucial for embracing change and obtaining our goals.  It’s no wonder I keep writing the same resolutions year after year.  My head was engaged in the process, but certainly not my heart.  After listening to Rosie, I knew I couldn’t just go through the motions.  I needed to make a strong determination, followed by concrete actions to break through my donut-eating complacency. I may like donuts, but I love my life a lot more and I want to preserve my health. 

Like Rosie, we will have times when we backslide in our efforts.  It could be a donut, a grumpy mood, a harsh word, or even a financial setback such as losing one’s job.  But setbacks are only permanent if we allow them to be.  For me, I’d rather adopt the “Rosie” outlook and make a heart-felt determination to start anew. 

Love and peace,

Sally 

For more works by Sally, pick up 

Erase Negativity and Embrace the Magic Within

The Shakabuku Rock

By Sally Marks

Thanks Sally for contributing this story!

I read an uplifting story about how a sickly Korean woman overcame illness by helping others. Her story gave me the inspiration to use a similar tactic in my own life. 
 
The woman began practicing Buddhism and was encouraged to tell other about the philosophy, and to chant Nam Myoho Renge Kyo. She gathered several pebbles and placed them in her pockets. Every time she told someone about Buddhism, she removed one stone. In three months time all her stones were gone, and so was her debilitating illness. 

The word for introducing others to this particular sect of Buddhism is shakabuku. 

Proselytizing can be an uncomfortable practice – even when an individual has experienced absolute proof that chanting works. With that in mind, I decided to experiment with a whimsical icebreaker at my next Buddhist meeting. 

                                   By Nahualli

I purchased a number of colorful glass stones and placed them in a large, glass vase. I passed the vase around and told the members to take a few stones. They could take one, two, or a handful, but they would be using the stones at a later date. Everyone participated. Some folks carefully selected a single stone. Others took a handful. After everyone had their rocks I told them about the story of the Korean woman. I asked each person to carry their rocks around to remind them of the importance of telling others about their Buddhist practice. 
  
A week later, I was at a different meeting, and since I still had plenty of stones, I did the same icebreaker. One of the men, a fellow named Rich, had been at my previous meeting. He told the group that when he came home from the first meeting, he told his wife, Kathy, that he had a shakabuku rock. He was going to carry the stone with him to remind him to share Buddhism with others. Unfortunately, Rich had discovered that he never had the opportunity to have a casual conversation with anyone at work. He also knew religious discussions at work were a taboo subject.  
  
However, the following day, a coworker discovered Rich lived close to his house and asked if they could carpool to work. Rich gave the young man a ride and they wound up discussing philosophy. This unlikely event made it possible for Rich to tell the fellow about Buddhism. Rich told the folks at the meeting that the stone was a good reminder to take the time to share Buddhism with others - especially those who are suffering. 
  
While I believe in the importance of spreading Buddhism, I thought that the stones don’t need to be limited to only religious introductions – or shakabuku. I thought to myself that I could carry stones to remind myself to practice other good deeds as well. I try to be a thoughtful person, but it never hurts to have a little physical reminder. Since I have a habit of sticking my hands in my pockets anyway, I can use this simple act as an opportunity to nudge me in a kinder, gentler direction. The act can be as simple as a smile to a stranger, opening the door for someone, or simply a kind word. 
  
I’m using my shakabuku rocks to create a shift in my thinking. Rather than making a mountain out of mole hill when things do not go my way, my determination is to take a mole hill of kindness and turn it into a mountain – one beautiful, glass stone at a time. 

For more by Sally Marks, pick up
Erase Negativity and Embrace the Magic Within