Chanting to become a Woman of Unlimited Self-esteem

Danny Nagashima

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Chanting to become a woman of unlimited self-esteem - is the best medicine. When Amy chanted that way, everything in her life changed.

You can analyze your situation all you want . . . you have to get to the root of why you don't believe in the greatness of our own life. You have to grab the 'doubt of your greatness' by the root, and yank it out of your life. You must chant to awaken to your greatness. Chant to appreciate and value your own life. The answer is probably simple. But, since we over-analyze our situation, it gets complicated and the solution seems farther away. When Amy followed Danny's guidance, it was unbelievable what she felt inside. Your mission as a Buddhist is to be happy – not master suffering. We have the negative part of us, and the positive part of us. There's a part of us that believes we can do it, and then the negative part says, 'Who are you kidding?'

You have to fight to not give into your negativity. This is not just about your being a writer, a doctor, a secretary, or whatever your profession maybe. It is about you becoming the woman you always wanted to become - a woman who really values your life. This is an amazing opportunity. THE OBSTACLES YOU FACE ARE THE ANSWER TO YOUR PRAYERS. Those feelings of self-doubt, chase those feelings away -- 'I'm just a scam artist, doctor, lawyer, etc., a failure. – Those feelings you have to face and then chase them away. How you feel about yourself -- that feeling of self-loathing, of not being good enough, of not answering the phone, because it may be someone you are accountable to professionally - those are feelings you have to face and then chase them away.

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Your talent is not the question. It's how you feel about yourself. This is karma. You need to value your own life, appreciate your own life . This has nothing to do with someone validating you. Amy said she followed her heart. She followed her Buddhahood and the effect from that, the benefit from that was MASSIVE. You have to follow your heart and truly treasure your life. When you sit in front of the Gohonzon, chant to have the most reverence for your life. The Gohonzon is the embodiment of your enlightened life. Your life deserves that kind of reverence. When Nichiren Daishonin inscribed the Dai-Gohonzon, he was chanting Daimoku already (out of the greatness of his own wisdom he inscribed the Dai-Gohonzon for all humanity) so everyone could relieve their own suffering.

IF YOU CAN CHANT FOR 2-WEEKS TO REALLY BE A WOMAN OF UNLIMITED SELF-ESTEEM, AND TO REALLY TRULY APPRECIATE YOUR LIFE, YOUR FLAWS, YOUR ACCOMPLISHMENTS, YOUR DEFEATS, YOUR LOSSES, YOUR VICTORIES, WHAT YOU HAVE CREATED, APPRECIATE YOUR TALENT - FOR 2 WEEKS—THEN EVERYTHING WILL CHANGE.

FORGET about all the past suffering in your life. That will just make you feel more impotent. Put it away. From now on, really chant about being a woman of unlimited self-esteem. Really appreciate everything from your life. – All the things about you, that make you incredibly unique and wonderful. And, remember that all the negative feelings – the heartaches—you will be able to use to inspire and help others. This is the suffering you need to share your experience and help others change. Focus on really, awakening your greatness. This is the opportunity you needed to go through, so that you can become outrageously successful. So you can fulfill your dreams. If you focus on this – really valuing your life now, then everything will fall into place. And, in a much bigger way—self worth and self-respect will emerge . And it is something no one can give you. The universe is showing you what you need to tackle.

When you first chant this way, a lot of negativity may come out of your life. Awful feelings may surface. Let it pass through you, like the flu. Transform the darkness. See the enlightened side of your fear. We always bring into our lives what matches our life condition, so don't fear it. Chant to feel incredible joy about your worth. When you get yourself to a place where you can absolutely see the miracle of your own life, the greatness of your own life, everything in your life will completely transform. We have to believe in our own Buddha nature. When we face the Gohonzon, we should say, 'I am going to praise my own wonderful life.'

It is important to awaken to our own greatness. Now is the time for you to start over. Your life is the Gohonzon! When you pray to a deity, your prayers are passive. Our lives are the Mystic Law. You must appreciate and value your own life. The Gohonzon is not outside of you. When you receive a benefit, it was you who created it. This is active prayer. You must awaken to your greatness. Believe in the greatness, in the magnificence of your own life. The Gohonzon is the manifestation of Nichiren Daishonin's enlightenment. Just as a beautiful piece of art elicits a response, or a great book touches your life in a certain way, we must elicit the Buddha nature from our own lives. It is right there. The Gohonzon is the perfect vehicle to bring out our greatest potential.

So, when you display your Buddhahood, bring out that strength, joy, that vibrant life condition, then you take that to the world and change the environment. We're not necessarily chanting for the house, the car, and the relationship . . . but we are chanting to elevate our life condition to attract that happiness . The results we see in our own lives are a reflection of our life condition. Every day, chant to manifest your Buddha nature consistently. Chant to rise above your basic tendency (I think mine is anger).

Chant with the expectation 'I WILL MANIFEST MY BUDDHAHOOD!' And that's what will arise. I create my own fortune. I am a Buddha, and I will manifest it everyday. I have to believe I deserve boundless happiness. The Buddha is who I really am. Every day I must manifest my Buddhahood and rise above the belief that I am a mere common mortal who does not deserve fortune in her life. Don't negate your life when you are in front of the Gohonzon. Don't beg, scream and don't berate the Gohonzon or your own life. The Gohonzon is the tool we need to bring out our Buddhahood. My life is the Gohonzon . Don't slander your life. I will fulfill every one of my dreams, for ME. We already possess something incredible – our Buddha nature, the Gohonzon. But sometimes we don't believe it.

But, we have everything we need to get us out of poverty, to transform our lives. But if I don't believe that the billion dollars (figure of speech for GREAT benefit) is mine, I won't be able to enjoy it. It is time to CASH THE CHEQUE. TRUST THAT THE GOHONZON IS THE ABSOLUTE MEANS FOR YOU TO TRANSFORM YOUR LIFE. TRUST IS THE KEY WORD. CHANT WITH THE EXPECTATION THAT EVERY ONE OF YOUR WILDEST DREAMS WILL BE FULFILLED BEYOND YOUR WILDEST IMAGINATION. CHANT TO BELIEVE IN YOUR BUDDHAHOOD. TRUST IN THE GREATNESS OF YOUR LIFE.

In 'On Attaining Buddhahood' Nichiren Daishonin makes the primary point – to free ourselves from the sufferings of birth and death we have endured in lifetime after lifetime and to attain absolute happiness we must awaken to the mystic truth that has always been within our lives – that truth is Nam-Myoho-Renge- Kyo. That truth is that I am a BUDDHA.

Amy got guidance to chant for the right man to come into her life for her happiness. It seemed too easy, she said. She questioned the guidance ''what if he is a midget? What if he is poor?'' But that day she met her husband. Trust the power of your Daimoku. Your life will be HUGE! Put your life first. Trust that ''billion-dollar check''(you are afraid to cash) does exist. Trust that you have EVERYTHING you need for your happiness – it is in the Gohonzon – it is in your life!

When you look at the Gohonzon know that you have exactly what you need to fulfill every prayer and become wildly, extraordinary happy!




Positive Discussion Points on Becoming Women of Unlimited Self Esteem

Ø Believe we can do it
Ø Fight to not give into negativity
Ø Become the woman you want to be
Ø Value your life
Ø Appreciate your life including your flaws
Ø Treasure your life
Ø Have reverence for your life
Ø Forget about the past sufferings in your life
Ø Believe that you are incredibly unique and wonderful
Ø Become outrageously successful at fulfilling your dreams
Ø Praise your own wonderful life
Ø Create your own benefit in your life
Ø Bring out our strength, joy and vibrant-life condition
Ø Believe in your own Buddha nature
Ø Realize that your life is the Gohonzon
Ø Manifest your extraordinary side
Ø Fulfill all of your dreams
Ø You have everything you need to transform your life

Negative discussion points on becoming Women of Unlimited self-esteem

Ø Not believing in our greatness
Ø Who are we kidding - we can't do it
Ø Feelings of self doubt
Ø Believing we are not good enough
Ø Self loathing
Ø Needing the validation of others
Ø I am a mere mortal who does not deserve fortune in my life
Ø Begging to, screaming to, or berating the Gohonzon/our own life
Ø I can't do it
Ø Holding on to past sufferings in our lives

Prayers to Enhance Becoming Women of Unlimited Self Esteem
Ø Chant to awaken to my greatness, my magnificence
Ø Chant to appreciate the value of my life
Ø Chant to be happy
Ø Chant to appreciate my talent
Ø Chant to feel incredible joy about my worth
Ø Chant to manifest my Buddha nature consistently
Ø Chant to rise about my basic negative tendency
Ø Chant to forget about the past garbage in my life
Ø Believe in my own Buddha nature
Ø Realize that my life is the Gohonzon
Ø Trust that the Gohonzon is the means to transform my life


Chant to become a woman of unlimited self-esteem

Every time you decide to put Love first it affects the energy of everyone and everything in your stratosphere. Hold a vision of Love with one-pointed concentration, and all that you've feared and resisted will change before you.

Human Dignity

How does Buddhism understand human dignity? 
From where does it spring? 
What supports and sustains it?

The starting point for Buddhism is the value and sanctity of life. For example, in one letter to a follower, Nichiren states that the value of a single day of life exceeds all other treasures. Buddhism further views each individual life as a manifestation of a universal life force.

From the Buddhist perspective, given the mind-boggling number of life-forms that fill the universe, human life is rare privilege with special responsibilities. As Nichiren, referring to a passage from the Nirvana Sutra, describes this: "It is rare to be born a human being. The number of those endowed with human life is as small as the amount of earth one can place on a fingernail."

What makes human life unique is the scale of our choice, the degree to which we are free to choose to act for good or evil, to help or to harm.

A recent book on the challenges of aging introduces the story of a young woman, married and with young children, who found herself suddenly in the position of having to care for her mother-in-law, bedridden following a stroke. At first the young woman could not understand why this had happened to her, why her already demanding life should be further burdened in this way. Through her Buddhist practice she was able to realize that she could, depending on how she chose to approach this situation, make of it an opportunity to create value. She was able to transform her initial feelings of resentment toward the older woman into a sense of appreciation.

Ultimately, the Buddhist understanding of human dignity is rooted in the idea that we are able to choose the path of self-perfection. We can, in other words, consistently make those difficult choices for creativity, growth and development. Buddhahood, or enlightenment, is how this state of self-perfection--a condition of fully developed courage, wisdom and compassion--is described. The idea that all people--all life, in fact--have this potential is expressed by the concept, stressed particularly in the Mahayana tradition, that all living beings possess Buddha nature.

In concrete, practical terms, this comes down to the idea that everyone has a mission--a unique role that only she or he can play, a unique perspective to offer, a unique contribution to make. As SGI President Daisaku Ikeda recently wrote in a book for high school students, "Everyone has a mission. The universe does nothing without purpose. The fact that we exist means that we have purpose."

The older woman in the story likewise sought to find a way to use her severely limited capacities to contribute to the well-being of the household. Since she still had use of her hands, she took up knitting--partly as a form of therapy, partly to make useful things for the family. She also enjoyed keeping watch over the home when the others were away.

From the Buddhist perspective, we always have the option of choosing to create value from even the most difficult situation. Through such choices we can fulfill our unique purpose and mission in life, and in this way give fullest expression to the inherent treasure of our human dignity. There is perhaps no more solid foundation for human rights than a general awakening to the human dignity that resides in every one of us.

(July 2000 SGI Quarterly)

Polishing Ourselves to Deserve an Ideal Soul mate Part 2

A Young Women's Division member, capable and beautiful, had to suffer repeatedly from her vicious karma relationship. Her karma had been played out continuously for a few years by several young men of a similar type, as if the were in a relay race. Each time the relationship started, she was so attracted to one of them and would quickly surrender her heart & body, thus becoming a subordinate to the man. She had offered herself as cheap game for those men to capture easily. As a result, they did not cherish her but, one after another, dumped her when the fresh excitement faded.

Obviously, none of them was the man that she was supposed to share her life with and her karma would trap her anyway at the time when she had no wisdom to distinguish good from bad. She could realize the problem of her karma until she strove to quadruple her daimoku and kosen rufu activities for a while.

She then persistently strengthened her faith, practice and study with the goal of eradicating her karma relationship. She also worked staunchly on her human revolution. In her case, she had to painstakingly force herself not to quickly jump into a new relationship before it was clear that she had transformed her life.

She has now found her ideal soul mate, an entirely different type of person to whom she would have noticed before. Now she can genuinely treat him very sweetly to her hearts content because he gives her in return, even more love & care. However, this only transpired when she had elevated her life state and changed her perspective towards men and could thereby recognize and choose this lucky man who suits her so perfectly.

Three-years diligent practice, amidst tears and heart breaking experiences, was indeed touch to overcome in her quest to eradicate her bad karma relationship but it was well worth all the effort. If she had never made that effort, she would still be stumbling and struggling with the same karma, probably for the rest of her life,

The second answer that our lives can contribute is to choose wisely.

We don’t want to risk our happiness by grabbing someone just because that person is available to us. If we do, we can expect the endless struggle that’s going to befall us. Feeling desperately lonely, fearing that there is no chance of finding a better partner or thinking we don’t deserve a good one are no reasons to perfunctorily settle for less. Its better to leave one’s heart yearning for love than to fill the aching void without discretion.

Again, we would be much better off if we turned the energy of desperation, fear and struggle into the fuel to forge our development first. Once we have cultivated more commendable quality, naturally we qualify to have more options to choose from. Thus, we can hold our heads high and choose wisely.

Let’s look at what a harmonious seamless relationship is like in Nichiren Daishonin’s eyes:-

THE HIYOKI IS A BIRD WITH ONE BODY AND TWO HEADS. BOTH OF ITS MOUTHS NOURISH THE SAME BODY. HIMOKU ARE FISH WITH ONLY ONE EYE EACH, SO THE MALE AND FEMALE REMAIN TOGETHER FOR LIFE. A HUSBAND AND WIFE SHOULD BE LIKE THEM.

Letter to the Brothers, WND p 502

The ideal relationship should be reciprocally nourishing. It is very important that with our partner we inspire and encourage, respect and cherish, motivate and invigorate each other. We share dreams & hopes, embrace each others beliefs and character, shed tears together over adversities, and work as two in body but one in mind on mutual goals. Be sure that both sides are mature, sincere , independent, genuine, positive, caring and willing to improve & grow.

We don’t wish to be involved with someone whose energy is inherently destructive and negative& will hinder our happiness. If our prospective partner tends to dominate or overpower us. Unreasonably and if we are not sure of our ability to joyously accommodate such a strong personality, lets employ our wisdom and judgment and stay away from them. We have to be on our guard instead and not blindly jump into predictably doomed and painful relationship.

The third answer from our lives with which to solve our relationship problem is to renew the image of our soulmate.

Indeed, superficially speaking, it is hard to find someone whose strengths and weaknesses fit us perfectly. But, it is up to us how we think and work to compliment each other and create value from our partner’s seemingly negative traits in our eyes.

When the ideals and desires of the two sides are unbalanced or confrontational before we treat it, as a doomed relationship and helplessly plunge into the commitment or before we rush to abandon the relationship, there’s something we can try. In fact, activating our wisdom awakens us to the untrue portrait we have painted of our partner. We can also employ the teachings of Nichiren Buddhism to gain a truthful, vivid and positive image of the same person.

There are different angles from which we can review our opinion about our partner and find ways to amend and adjust the differences between both sides.

Are the fundamental problems in our relationship definitely unbearable in the long term? Are they fixed without the possibility of improvement or change? Are they solely our partners fault? Or are they the result of our own deceived mind due to the function of the three poisons of greed, anger & foolishness? Most importantly of all, do we have the wisdom to see the reality of the relationship as the manifestation of our own karma, & do we thus want to take total responsibility? What can we do to help our partner and to turn around our relationship?

Ever wonder why the same deserted man or woman can become the sweetheart of another person? One man’s garbage is another man’s treasure. That is to say the value of everything changes, depending on its relationship with the environment and depending on how we look at it. Does that mean tht we can reformat the pattern of our relationship without changing partners? Yes!!

Here come the tough questions to ponder and the real task to follow through on: Can we allow our partners the room to live their lives instead of enveloping them in the narrow fashion of our frame of mind? Are we willing to employ the kind of wisdom, compassion and strength, our Buddha Nature, and to resolve to process the poisons into medicines? Will we set out on this new avenue, whatever it takes, with only a positive attitude, and create nothing but good causes for the relationship? Do we want to exert our wisdom and compassion to understand where our partners are coming from and practice this Buddhism on their behalf to help them change their karma and erase trauma?

The fourth answer to helping ourselves in our relationships is to reflect upon what we want and be well prepared for it. In other words, ask for what we want as well as doing what we have to do to deserve it.

Neetu Vaswani

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